This is my purpose is a poem I wrote during my first year, first semester in college. I wrote the poem in a creative writing course, where we were assigned to put ourselves in an Israeli soldier’s shoes. As a Palestinian, my interest in the topic is based on the fact that it is rare to view our “enemies” in a humanitarian way, because we believe that if we do, we are justifying their crimes. Therefore, In order to understand their point of view in the occupation, we must put ourselves in their position, to get a sense of why Israeli soldiers must cooperate, and how they would feel about that.

I was born here
this is where I belong.
Our whole lives we’ve been scattered
all over the world;
hated, murdered, even called
the scum of the earth.
We are the victims.
My main purpose is to
maintain the safety in my country.
I do not harm anyone
unless my life is being threatened.
and when it is...
I shoot.
The bullet pierces the body,
a soft cry comes out,
blood shatters
the smell of it in the air
you can almost taste it.
These fucking Arabs won’t stop fighting back.
I look to see
a boy’s corpse lying on the ground,
my little brother comes to mind.
This boy whom I killed
would have been a friend,
could have written in graffiti on the walls
“Fuck Israeli Dogs.”
But, I ended his life.
What have I done?

...

I shake it off,
put myself together
and regain focus.
This is my job,
this is my purpose.
I have no other choice
I wish to live in peace
but, water and oil
don’t mix.

Manal Hamadah is a student at Al-Quds Bard College. She is an aspiring writer and is very passionate about her writing. She wants to pursue her dream of becoming a famous writer in order to deliver a message to the world about the Palestinian struggle.

See PDF www.thisweekinpalestine.com/i193/pdfs/article/this_is_my_purpose.pdf